To be taken five times a week.

Here is some advice that may just change your life.

Instead of switching the tellybox off after the lunchtime Neighbours O' Clock has come to an end, leave it on.

"What?" I hear you cry, "This is insania!"

Well no actually, because Neighbours O' Clock turns into Doctors O' Clock. And Doctors is amazing.

Why Doctors is amazing:

• It's set in Birmingham.

Therefore I am now watching it to stop the homesickness. Although thinking about it, it may actually make me homesick what with everyone talking properly and wandering around areas I recognise and casually saying that they got their new top from the Bullring or Solihull Touchwood (particularly amazing as this is where I shop). Although thinking about it further, I don't actually get homesick.

Doctors-love may just be a Brummy thing, hinted at by all the non-brums who gather in my room each day to watch Neighbours fucking off the moment the theme tune starts. But I don't see how a programme with the following storylines can not appeal to everyone. So far this week:

• A baker who wanted time off work brought in a nice fat Gateaux to bribe a lady doctor into writing him a sick note. Lady doctor then offered another lady doctor a piece, which made her turn into a total mentalist because she's on a diet and mistook this kind gesture for some sort of cholesterol-raising attempt on her life.
• Vikram Offcoronationstreet tried to con the absolutely ace receptionist out of lots of cash by pretending to sell her a house. He didn't though, so it's all ok.
• A bitchy exmodel refused to take lady doctor's advice about coming off the HRT because she thought it would make her ugly and her husband would start sticking his percy in other women for pleasure. Bitchy exmodel then started picking apart the lady doctor's appearance, which was fabulous. Bitchy exmodel's daughter was also involved in this somehow. She was brilliant because the actress looked a good ten years older than the one playing bitchy exmodel.

Obviously I haven't seen enough to know any of the names yet, but it shouldn't take long.


x


P.S. In order to get full enjoyment from Doctors, you really have to take into account that it's a bit rubbish.

P.P.S. I actually know one of the runners on Doctors. Wow.